Mapping the Limits of the Soul 11: My love it don’t die; it just goes from girl to girl
…town to town and rose to rose all over the world.
Thank you to AA Bondy for the line. A rival subtitle was ‘We’ve done nothing to each other that time cannot erase’ from Bob Dylan’s seriously underrated album Street Legal.
This one goes out to the wonderous women-folk of this glorious planet.
Lades, you know I love you. Your freckles, your beauty spots, your laugh lines. Your curves, the dimples on either side of your lower spine. Your strange regard for fashion, or refreshing lack of regard for fashion. Your wonderful, delightful, otherwordly complexity. You are all precious puzzles to me.
I remember every kiss you gave me, the sensation of your lips. Every smile that made me feel the connection and joy in your company, how your eyes danced and sparkled at my words. Every time that, in which ever way, you said yes.
But the time has come for me to take myself off the market, out of the game of chasing you around.
I am in love.
With my one true love.
The Pacific Ocean.
I have danced in your souls before, and revelled in your wonderful personalities and quirks. I love you. But I must follow my heart.
Today was our second day of diving out here. Yesterday was calm and the ocean was a million shades of blue; from deep violet blue to radiation sickness aqua. It was a marble swirl of color from the palette of a mad artist! We dove in a place that looked like an angry giant had taken the reef and tried, piecemeal, to turn the reef on its side. There were algal forests, fish and corals everywhere! I am told that this is the worst place I will have to dive on this trip. One person said that whoever had decided to make such an ugly place a research site should be fired. I was blown away! This? This is bad??
Here is a picture of me doing my safety stop at that site. I am accompanied by 80L of seawater (mis ballons!! I played drums on them for quite a while, composing my homage to home- this is the environment from which that tune shall rise!) I pumped off the bottom to do a metagenomic analysis on:
Today, I was assured that the diving would be better. Quite frankly, I could have dove the ‘bad’ site forever!!
Until we got to today’s sites!!
Again, the giants had been at play, but this time they had constructed ampitheatres of uplifted coral, crevices filled with delicate forms, fish darting among the convoluted substrate!! I saw a shark! The immediate fear upon recognising the outline followed by utter joy upon the realisation that it is just a reef shark cruising by all tough. Sweet little guys, come by any time!!
Here is a picture of a Joshua Tree-like Millepora (fire coral) party I gatecrashed!!
Party on little dudes!!
See the ampitheatre in the background? With the fishes? And the colors? And the wonderful blue of the water?
I was in heaven!!
But, you know what? The Pacific was not done with wooing me!
After this site, we came back to the ship through the building swell (the mothership buds off our little baby boats every day like alien pods), ploughing and skipping along in our bright orange boat!
The sea rained down upon me her salty kisses, welcoming me home, back into her embrace!!
We then headed into the swell for about 10 miles to our next site. We danced and swooned and swooped and swerved, we flew over the waves, drenched in the Pacific’s love, a veritable shower of affection!! The boat was like my soul, how it sails along, bouncing, dancing, gaining strength and speed from all the beauty that surrounds us. Then we would misstep, and the boat would plough into a trough, smash into a wave, destroying the illusion of harmony. Only to rise up again, ready for the next dance. My soul sang with camaraderie with the boat! Bounce, dance, trip, rise, bounce, dance, trip! On through the salty kisses that comprise this world!
The water was a miraculous blue! The vision of such a color adds years to your life. Alleviates stress. Contextualises all struggles. It was holy Pacific water. The Pacific is truth; she shares with you. Drink with your eyes; your soul is a desiccated sponge!
The light was reflecting off the ripples in the swells in an electric, butterfly scales iridescent blue. It set my soul on fire!
I was laughing with every spray, every wave that set the light to shimmering. I was home.
Home to my life. Home to my love.
All day, I compose love poems to the Pacific. Every night I forget them. I write them anew the next day as she seduces me again just by being her.
Now I see clearly how the dolphin god persuaded me. As a manifestation of the ocean I have always so deeply loved, wanted to be loved by, he had ultimate leverage on my soul. And as a man who always preferred love as an abstract, poetic concept, rather than the emotional rough and tumble sometimes-brawl that it is, a dolphin abstraction appeals to me!
But how will the Pacific and I make our love work?
Will I be writing a letter to the Pacific one day saying that I can’t do it any more; that I have fallen for a human?